Answers....

If you've been paying attention to my rambling long enough, you know that we have been on an amazing journey with Clay. Ever since he was born I have known in my gut that there was something not quite typical about him. His behaviors, his emotions, his way of interacting with others and the world around him....all of these things were very unique to Clay, but very different from the rest of the population. When he was 15 months old our pediatrician in Coppell, Dr. Anne Georgulas, referred us for special evaluations for Clay. She noticed that there was a developmental delay and did not hesitate to get us started on the path of receiving services that he needed. He has received services for speech, development, and occupational therapy. We are even seeing private therapists in addition to the therapists that come to our home.

Fast-forward to almost a year and a half later. Yesterday we finally received confirmation for what I have known in my heart for a long time. Clay has been formally diagnosed with Autism.

We went to the Autism Clinic at Texas Children's Hospital for a diagnostic test called ADOS, which stands for Autism Diagnostic Observation Schedule. A child psychiatrist who works strictly with the Autism Center administered the test. This test required me to be in the room, but not speak to Clay or interact with him in any way. That was HARD!!! He was resistant at first and freaked out a little about even going into the room....until he saw that Dr. Diane had Sesame Street toys. At that moment he decided that she was his friend for life. She had several little toy stations set up in the room. There was a truck, some plastic plates, a fork and a spoon, a baby doll, they played with bubbles, she blew up a balloon and released it to fly around the room...all things that you would just think, "Hm. They're just playing here." I assure you that it was very purposeful play. Clay was in a GREAT mood. He was happy, content, and at ease. The only time he got scared or irritated was when she called him over to her bunny rabbit and then turned on the remote control which made him jump and wiggle. To be honest, that freaked me out a little bit, too. The best part was when they were playing with the baby doll. They had a birthday party for the baby, made a pretend cake, Clay fed the baby, patted her head, ate some Goldfish, and then it was time for the baby to take a nap. Clay walked with her while she wrapped the baby doll in a blanket and said, "Nigh Nigh Baby." They played for a little bit and Dr. Diane said, "Clay! The baby is awake!" Clay went over, took the baby's socks off and began doing joint compressions on the baby, something that we do with him in therapy and when he gets agitated to help calm his nerves. Dr. Diane looked at me and said, "Is he doing joint compressions on that baby?" I said, "Yep." And we both had a great laugh!!!

There are a lot of other things they did, but it would take me forever to describe all of it. The test lasted for an hour and a half to two hours. When we were finished, we left the room for a quick diaper change and by the time we were back the test had been scored. We walked in and she said, "Mrs. Stoker, Clay did score positive for Autism." I started crying and said, "Thank you! Thank you! You have no idea what a relief it is to hear this! I have known for so long. Thank you!!" She looked at me and said, "Um ok. Well, I'm used to the tears, but not the profuse expression of thanks." I told her that I felt like the past two and a half years of my feelings, experiences, frustrations, and efforts had all been validated. We finally had a name for what Clay struggles with every day.

I know it may sound crazy to you, but I feel so empowered. We went out to dinner last night to celebrate. Yep, that's right. We celebrated. A HUGE door has just been opened for Clay. He will now have access to so many more services and there are so many laws that protect his right to these services. I have so much to do in the days ahead. The good news is that the most important basic needs have already been met - he is in therapy. Early and intense intervention is key. I truly believe that had we not intervened when we did that we would possibly have a child who was non-verbal, completely unable to cope with his surroundings, and miserable in his skin 24/7. Don't get me wrong, he definitely has periods where all of these things are in play, but he is not a child who sits in the corner and rocks all day. Clay is, at this time, high-functioning, and our hope is that with continued therapy he will remain as such.

We will have another appointment at the end of this month at the Meyer Center for Developmental Pediatrics at Texas Children's Hospital. They work in tandem with the Autism Center. At this appointment we will meet with a Developmental Pediatrician specially chosen for Clay based on his characteristics, and possibly a Pediatric Neurologist. They will most definitely take lots of blood samples for genetic testing, blood metal levels, as well as checking to see if he possibly has a mitochondrial disorder. This is just the beginning, but I feel like we are winning. This is not a sprint. It is a marathon. A life-long journey. He will always have Autism. It will never go away. It is not something that yo

u can cure. All we can do is meet his needs as they arise and pray and trust that God will lead us to the right people who will do their very best for him.

Please, please, please feel free to ask any questions you have. None of this is a secret. It is not something that we are ashamed of. This is our precious baby boy that is a gift from God. God created him as he is and knew that we were the best parents for him. To be honest, I think that God knew WE needed Clay. He simplifies our life in a way I can't explain. To try to see things through his eyes has been an amazing adventure. To watch Luke care for his brother makes my heart explode with pride. He is our little miracle on earth. Is this the path that I would have chosen for him or our family? Of course not. It certainly will not be an easy life for any of us, but for now we chose to celebrate the victory in this diagnosis and thank God for the many blessings he has given us along the way. I know some of this may sound strange, but it's true.

The top of my blog has the scripture that was printed on Clay's birth announcement. "From the fullness of HIS grace, we have all received one blessing after another."

Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow.